New Year...

For the first time in almost 6 years, I closed a year saying to myself, "We made it and it was a good year for my family. A really good year."  I can't say that about any year since 2006.  Since 2006, we have dealt with health issues that have almost taken the lives of both William and B, financial issues that have made it hard to even buy milk (I at one point stole money from Mara's piggy bank to buy milk.  I'll pay you back Mara bean.) and family issues that have almost destroyed our family.  BUT, we made it.  We are better for it.  There have been times in last 5 years where I have lost hope over and over again.  Can't get out of bed hope.  There were moments when I was even scared to smile.  Yes, scared.  Because if I smiled, then that would mean I was happy and if I was happy, then something bad would happen, because it always did.  I got to a point where I was sick of hearing people say, "You poor Elggren's.  What else are you going to have to deal with?!"  Like I hadn't asked myself that 10 bagillion times?!

The other night, I was worrying about something and B looked at me said, "Stop trying to figure out the meaning of life.  It will come and it will be great.  But, only if you let be great."  He then kissed my head and tucked me into bed.  I love that man.  I tell him at least 30 times a day.

2012- It is what it is.  What will happen will happen.  So, here it is.  My resolution.  No one can stop me from smiling and living life to the fullest.  I want to be the best I can EVERYDAY!  I found this quote on Pinterest of course, and I LOVE it.  It is exactly what I would say.

And to end, I spent New Year's Eve with some of my very favorite people.  People who have helped me up when I couldn't stand.  People who have given when they haven't needed to, but wanted to.  People who haved made me laugh so hard, I thought I would pass out.  People who loved me and my family more than I thought a friend could. People who have taught me to look at the world and people from a completely different and beautiful perspective.  People who have taught me that it really is ok to be me and that it really is ok to be happy.  So, thank you Erica, Emily, Vicki, Paul, Charles, Ben and all the kiddos!  LOVE YOU ALL!!!!  Here's to a wonderful New Year!