That's how every Sunday should be...

I was speechless today.  Sacrament meeting was breathtaking in more ways than I can describe. You had to be there to realize the power of the spirit that was present.  So what I am about to write will not do the moment justice.  I will try only because I want to remember how I felt and the answers that I received through the message of someone that I don't even know.

I truly I had every intention of NOT going to church today. It's true.  I have been struggling with things lately.  I have been praying for help and have not gotten answers, yet. So, let's just say, I wanted to take the day off, play a little hookie. Feel sorry for myself and go into denial. blah blah blah... I was so tired this morning, I couldn't even get out of bed.  I pushed my snooze button 5 times.  As I layed in bed, I kept telling myself how comfortable I was and how it would be fun to just wake up, make pancakes and just hang out with my family.  Sounds good, huh?! 
Then I remembered last week that someone said, we didn't want to miss next weeks Sacrament Meeting.  It would be special and here is why... A choir group called the Sterling Singers were going to perfrom.  (This is what I got from someone who described them to me, so I apolgize if I don't tell the story just right.) 
The Sterling Singers are a group of people that got together in the early 90's after all of the public schools were required to remove the word God from songs, etc.  The people who joined the choir came from all denominations and all walks of life. All with the common goal of wanting to praise our Savior in song for all to hear.

After remembering that they would be there, it got me right out of bed.  I looked at the clock and realized that I had 4 people including myself to get ready in less than an hour. UGH! Long story short,we pulled it off.  Our morning was seamlessly perfect.  I didn't get a shower, but we were ready and my kids were happy!  Sunday mornings are usually horribly painful over here! 
So instead of laying in bed, although arguably it would have been comfortable, and I do believe that my body could have used a couple more hours of sleep, I got answers to my prayers in more ways than I could have dreamed.  I walked away full of hope and faith.
I also got a morning was it filled with angelic music (I truly believe Angels were present today) and strong testimonies of our Savior Jesus Christ.  The music was filled with songs like The King of Love My Shepard is Jesus, Once of Humble Birth, When I Survey the Wonderous Cross, How Beautiful and in closing Love Divine All Loves Excelling.  I had heard some of these songs before, but I have never listened as I did today.  Words of promise and the power of the Atonement.  If only we will come unto Him, he will carry us and protect us.

The choir director, Kelly Dehaan spoke of a time in which he was so full of anger. Anger that he could not control and didn't know why he had it.   I could relate immediately.  Anger has been controlling me lately.  I have so much inside of me and I don't know why.  I am extremely embarrassed to admit this.  I am not proud of my actions lately.  Anger is horribly toxic and I hate myself when I lose my temper.  I feel ugly and tainted.  I have prayed and prayed and prayed some more for this to go away from me.  I have gone to the temple and then prayed some more.  Although I have felt better in some aspects, I am still a walking time bomb.  One without a timer. I have been asking and expecting it to just be taken from me!  I didn't even think, that I would have to pull my own weight on this.

So my answer today was...
All things are possible, if we just have faith, but we have to be willing to do our part. The Atonement is real.  It is for real people with real problems.  It is for anybody and everybody who will accept it and act upon it.  It is through Him, that we can be healed from our sins and our weaknesses.  I am so grateful for the love that I have for my Savior.  For the first time in my life, I am not afraid to admit that I have faults. Many, actually. I am grateful that there is someone else out there that has struggled with what I am dealing with.  So much so, he can testifyed to me that I can change, because he did.  How we face our problems defines us.  It builds character and esteem.  It moves us closer to the end goal of where we should be.  I have been far from this place for the last couple of weeks. Today brought me back in more ways than I can describe.  It brought me back to what I already know and perhaps take for granted.  I am truly thankful for this morning.  I am truly thankful to those who dedicate their time to sing of Him.  I am thankful that it doesn't matter where you come from, just as long as you take Him with you.