Breaking my heart...

Over the last week or so, my heart has been breaking for my little 7 year old, Mara. She is facing things at school that I NEVER thought we would be dealing with in 1st grade.

I know that every kid deals with being teased at some point, but it happens to her on a daily basis.

Each morning when I do her hair, she cries to have me pull it back into a ponytail, because there are kids that tell her she is so ugly, she should just shave her head. So a ponytail is what we do to make her feel better, at least for the moment.

She is so consumed by what she wears, that it turns into a fight every morning before school. Her clothes "cannot make her look fat", and this includes her winter coat. A couple of weeks ago, I had found a darling dress at Walmart. Now let me be the first to say that I am not a fan of Walmart. I will go everywhere else, before I go there. BUT this dress was sooooo cute! I suggested that she wear it and she lost it. "It is from Walmart and you are making me look poor!" WHAT?! How does she know what that even means?!

From all of this, her anger has come out in ways I never thought! She has daily meltdowns that are so heartbreaking and intense for her that she literally will fall asleep afterwards because they take so much out of her. She screams and yells and throws her self on the ground. She tells me ' she is nothing and doesn't matter.'

I am heartbroken beyond belief. I cannot believe that kids can be so mean. But most important, I can't believe that she believes them! We have told her from the day she was born that she is beautiful both inside and out. Even at her age, she has been a rock for me to lean on and learn from. She is my baby! She is my life!

Part of me wants to shelter her from the cruel world, but that's just not realistic. I wish that I could just tell her that she is amazing, beautiful and unique and then I wish she would believe me. But right now, it's easier for her to believe kids than her mom and dad.

Today, I drove her to school with tears in my eyes as I watched her walk away looking deafeated before she even arrived. Her head hanging low.  No mother should have to watch that..

I will NOT put up with this! My daughter is beautiful in everyway possible. She is mine and I will fight for her! She deserves better. Everyone does! I WILL get to the bottom of this!